New York Times Reporters New Blondes

New York Times Reporters New Blondes — Due to the tendency The New York Times has developed in making extraordinarily boneheaded mistakes its reporting, author Andrew Klavan has suggested replacing demeaning blonde jokes with enlightening New York Times reporter jokes:

Here are our contributions:

A young ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain at a
bar in a small town. He’s going through his usual run of silly New York
Times reporter jokes when a big woman in the fourth row stands on her
chair and says,

“OK jerk, I’ve heard just about enough of your
denigrating New York Times reporter jokes. What makes you think you can
stereotype New York Times reporters that way? What does a person’s job
description have to do with their worth as a human being? It’s guys like
you who keep New York Times reporters like me from being respected at
work and in my community, of reaching my full potential as a person…
because you and your kind continue to perpetuate discrimination against
not only New York Times reporters but all reporters at large… all in
the name of humor.”

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to
apologize, when the New York Times reporter pipes up, “You stay out of
this mister, I’m talking to that little f%@#*er on your knee!

And

A New York Times reporter enters a bar and is soon joined by another.
They each order a beer clink the mugs and shout SIX FREAKING WEEKS!

A
third soon arrives. More beer is ordered. The toast is repeated: SIX
FREAKING WEEKS!! Finally a fourth and fifth arrive they get a table. The
order pitchers. They toast continually shouting SIX FREAKING WEEKS!!

Finally the bartender comes over and says “You people seem to be celebrating something. Do you mind if I ask what it is?”

The
lead New York Times reporter says “Not at all buddy. You know how
people are always saying that New York Times reporters are dumb as
bricks? Well, me and my friends got one of those jigsaw puzzles that
said four to six years and we finished it in SIX FREAKING WEEKS!!!”

New York Times Reporters New Blondes

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