Rest Easy, Kisser Who Eluded TSA Captured

Authorities have tracked down the villain who snuck beneath a security rope to give his girlfriend a goodbye smooch at the Newark Airport, Sunday, creating a massive panic.

The vile perpetrator is Haisong Jiang, a 28-year-old Rutgers bio-medical research grad student from Jiangxi, China who is living in Piscataway, N. J.

No expense was spared in the investigation. Jiang was working out at the gym when detectives arrived so he turned himself in.

The horrific act occurred when the love of his life, Qianqun,  who had been visiting him for Christmas break,  was returning to her job in  Los Angeles   as a statistician. A Transportation Security Administration guard left his post to take a cell phone call giving the criminal Jiang an opportunity to transgress the law with his lover.

The TSA has issued a series of statements to comfort the public, making it unnecessary for Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano to have to again proclaim that the system worked.

Jiang is being charged with defiant trespass.

Jiang’s roommate Hui gave what perhaps may be a reason for the crime.

“We know that he’s very excited to have a real woman,” Hui said.

He said Qiangun is expected to stand by her man.

“His girlfriend is very upset,” Hui said.  “I think she will be here in two days to face this with him.”

While the brave men and women of the TSA won this round in their battle with terrorism, many fear that if Jiang had carried a Koran and  yelled Allahu Akbar he would have gotten away scot-free.

Rest Easy, Kisser Who Eluded TSA Captured

 

Rest Easy, Kisser Who Eluded TSA Captured

 

1 thought on “Rest Easy, Kisser Who Eluded TSA Captured”


  1. No excuse,lover boy.Minimum $1,000 fine and 3 days in jail for disrupting thousands of people and BTW,er breaking the law.
    The TSA “guard” should be fired.period.End of sentence

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