If you don’t get them, take heart. It means you’re not a nerd.
1. Knock Knock, Who’s there?, To, To who?, No, to whom
2. Argon walks into a bar. The bartender says, “We don’t serve noble gases here!”. Argon doesn’t react.
3. How many computer programmers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Whoa no! That is a hardware problem!
4. Q: How many ears does Spock have? A: 3, a right ear, a left ear and a final frontier.
5. While you would think that the glass is half empty of half full engineers think that the glass is two times larger than it needs to be while
6. politicians would say that the glass would more empty if the opposition was in charge and
7. surrealists would try to believe that the glass is half of a slowly rotting lemon while
8. scientists would believe that you cannot predict how full the glass is because you changed the outcome just by measuring it.
9. A higgs boson particle walks into a church and the Preacher says, “You can’t be in here! You call yourself the god particle and that’s sacrilegious!”. The Higgs boson says, “But without you couldn’t have mass!”
10. Heisenburg and Schrodinger are driving in a car when they are pulled over by a police officer. He asks, “Do you know how fast you were going?” Heisenburg replied, “Nope, but I knew exactly where I was!”. The police officer thought that this was quite a suspicious answer so he searched the car and found a dead cat in the trunk. He asked, “Did you know that there is a dead cat in your trunk?” Schrodinger said, “I do now!”
Nerd Jokes